"Truth" in Advertising?

I'm finding the apartment search a bit easier than last winter--at least in the respect of searching the ads and watching out for "For Rent" signs.  I'm a little more savvy at recognizing the scams.  And there are a lot of those!


The most prevalent scam is where the person posts an ad that seems to be a great deal.  Like a 2 bedroom duplex in Naperville for $600 a month.  Pets welcome!  So you send an email to them and find out that they had to leave the country because they're a doctor with UNICEF or a missionary or a teacher.  Many of them say they're in Lagos.

Lagos, Nigeria

I had to look it up because I thought Lagos was a city in Texas. Oops!

Anyway, they say they didn't have anyone to leave the keys with, so they have them with them.  All I have to do is send them the first month's rent and the security deposit (equal to the first month's rent) and they will mail the keys to me.  Uh huh.  And I'm the third cousin, twice removed to the Queen of England.  And as the robot said "Danger, Will Robinson!"

I wonder how many people actually fall for it, though.  Probably very few, but I still feel sorry for the any schmuck who gets caught up in the excitement and sends a money order as requested.  (No checks, please.  Of course, because you can stop payment on a check!)

I know at least one person who might've fallen for it.  At least many years ago.  He was always a bit slow. After forty some years he's been taken to the cleaners so many times he finally learned to ask other people before making decisions.  While I have no real fondness for this person that I know, I would still feel badly that someone took him for $1200 or whatever. And while he is in the minority, there are other people like him out there.  They are too trusting, too naive or too stupid to know better.

Another problem I've found in searching the ads is what I call the Carrot Ruse.  The landlord places an ad that screams NEAR PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION! NEWER APPLIANCES!! PETS WELCOME!!!  You notice how each successive statement gets an additional exclamation point.  No rent amount is listed anywhere.  "Near public transportation" means that the train is so close you can see the whites of the passengers eyes and the horn will make your ears ring for an hour.  "Newer appliances" mean post-1960.  "Pets welcome" means you will pay an extra amount each month plus a non-refundable pet security deposit.

Then there are a lot of little things like the misspellings, which can be amusing or confusing: "Well Maintianed", "Newly Remodled" and my favorite "Just steps to Lack Michigan!"

There are the ads that leave you wondering what it is, exactly, that they are advertising:  $589 / 1br - Want a 9th life? - (Contact JUngle JAne).   Really? A "9th life"?  And in a jungle?

Some ads need to be more specific with their adjectives: $755 / 1br - Eviction? Bad credit? 
THAT'S OUR SPECIALTY - (chicago & burbs) I don't want to be evicted and I sure as heck don't want to rent from someone with bad credit!

Then there are the euphemisms.  "Garden" apartment means you are in the basement with those tiny windows that let you see people's feet walking by.  "Cozy" means you'll have to lay on your bed to open your dresser drawers. "Rehabbed" means that the last tenant had a dog that chewed up the rug and scratched up the doors.  "Worth the Price" means it's so expensive you'll have to have a six-digit annual salary to live there.  "Rent Just Reduced" means the place is such a dump that nobody wants to live there and/or the landlord is a jerk. "Close to Everything" means you will have a constant barrage of noise from the businesses next door and the car and foot traffic going by.

But I'm learning to separate the wheat from the chaff, so to speak.  I've got a couple of leads on what I hope are nice apartments.  Tomorrow I go to see one in Lemont.  The exterior looks like a cement block, but maybe inside it's a gem!